...that a board without rancor existed, and am sad that it took Maebee's loss for me to find it. I gave up on the other board (trolls and judges) a long time ago, but have been so grateful that people like Maebee were there for me when I needed them.

Anyway! My mom's stage 6-7 in a memory care facility, has been there 2 and 1/2 years. She sleeps most of the time, but is very verbal when awake. It's not understandable, mind you, but she seems content and she smiles. She hasn't known who I am for a year but still lights up when she sees me. There's been near ZERO physical deterioration, eats, drinks, walks, no weight loss. She wears Depends, but wouldn't need to if they'd toilet her regularly. The first home she was in (same price but didn't take Medicaid) was better staffed, gazillions of activities, better everything. This place is a plop'em in front of the TV in the dayroom place. I suspect when my mom begins to lose autonomy in eating and walking, she'll go real fast due to a UTI or dehydration. (And here's where I gave up on the other board) I don't know if I'll even be sorry when she's gone. My mom abused me emotionally my entire life, until Risperdol . Through the wisdom and advice of a few like Maebee, I was actually able to forgive her about a year ago, and hope someday to help others with histories similar to mine. Anyway, I'm glad I found this board and thanks to all!
Barb (with Mom: yes, we're twins)

Barbilou,

Welcome to our forum! Thanks so much for joining us as we need all the support, friendship and love that we can get, and of course love to give it too. We're not here to judge, as we all really have the same thing in common on our plates - AD.
And know too that many times we get away from AD, and have some fun things going every once in awhile, plus anytime you need to vent about anything, not even related to AD, we listen to that too.

And our advice comes from the heart. We try to be honest, if we're not, then it's not going to help anyone. But we do it with grace and dignity and compassion. I don't think you will ever find anyone that you will be angry with on here. And if you do get angry with one of us, let us know by PM. We learn to figure it out with one another on a one on one rather than announcing it to the whole forum.

Our administrator Aitan is a nice young man that keeps things simple here. And our moderator Lori, helps us get through things with simple say it like it is advice, and understands every aspect of this disease.

Your Mom sounds like she does pretty well even though she's in that late of a stage. I can only say thank God to that, as I think that's what we want the most for them.

You know Barbilou, mentally abusing someone their entire life is not an easy thing to have to go through. I think that thats wonderful that you forgave your mom. Your a much better person than I think I could have been. But I have to say its got to be easier living with forgiving someone than to dwell on it too much.

We all have times where the anger gets to be so bad that we resent our loved ones. I know many times I actually hate that my mother is here and is lasting this long. And she was a great mother. So please come on here and join us whenever you can. We need and want your help, and will help you whenever we can.

Hoping to hear from you soon.

Jackie

How wonderful to see an old familiar face. Welcome to the good side.

No judgement here. Frankly I am not very good at forgiving and certainly don't know if I could be any kind of a caregiver to someone who was abusive to me. I give you a lot of credit just for being there for her.

I'm so glad you found us.

Welcome! I learned a long time ago that until I have lived someone's life, .... you know the saying. I can completely understand where you're coming from, most of my life I've parented myself.

I'm glad you found us!!!!

Hi Barb! Good to see you! Welcome to the 'good' Board! I wrote a note to you earlier, and got porn-blasted, for the first time. Boobs in face! It has been happening to some people. Also, keep your Viral-Protection up too, otherwise, it is all good!

You were the full time RV'er right?

Hi Barb! Welcome to our board. No rancor and lots of hugging and sharing of the ups and downs with our LO's.

Do come often and let us know how life is going in your neck of the woods.

Welcome to the forum, Barb! I remember your story well in regards to your mom and your relationship. That's a tough one to wind up caring for the very person who caused you so much pain before AD. I would have trouble with it as well.

I'm glad you are here and look forward to having you hanging around. My folks aren't alive anymore but I still feel drawn to this place because of the wonderful people here.
Take care

Yes, Fulltime RVers, except we're currently NOT. Had to take a year off. My son's wife left him and the two babies, so we rented a big house for a year, moved him and the babies and us all in, and I went back to work to finance it so my son could finish grad school. DH watches babies (1 and 3) and I try to get enough sleep and work. SO good to see all you guys!
Barb

Hi Barb, I just came to this forum too and for the same reason. It's a much happier place and just what I need.
That's a lovely picture of you and your mom. My mom and I look a lot alike too.
Take care.
northernlights

Hi Barbilou! Welcome! Glad to see you found your way here. Hope you find it as helpful as we have.